her vagine was all disorganized.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Randomize
