I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
