Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Randomize
