hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Randomize