Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
