all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
