okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Randomize
