return my video game
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
