How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize