also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
