used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize