About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
