Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
