we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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