I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
