I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
