She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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