i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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