Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
