How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
