I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
