Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I just gargled with NyQuil
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
