I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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