dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
