I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
