She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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