Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
