Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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