ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
