Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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