I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
