Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Porn is love you can see.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
