It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Randomize
