did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
