You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
