so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
