it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
he thought i was a dude.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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