Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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