dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
