yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
