i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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