Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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