Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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