Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
