i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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