Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
