Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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