You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
