dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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