OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Randomize